Conversation below is a joke I heard today. I thought it to be rather funny. Just for laughs so please don't take it too seriously. =D
Note: Words in italic are banking terminologies for those who are not too familiar.

Dealer 1 (Chee ko male): Hey, do you guys care to know the size of my portfolio?

Dealer 1: (reply directed at dealer 2) Well...it's big, long and hard.

Dealer 2 (Gutsy female): Doesn't matter what your portfolio is like. What matters most is whether or not I have an open position and whether there's movement.